Do You Miss It?

boring date

Everyone here is definitely on a date.

The best part is trying to figure out how far into the relationship each couple is.

It’s obvious the couple in front of us is fairly early on in the game, judging by their body language.

Others seem a lot cozier.

We haven’t been out alone in two months and while I hate the term “date night”, it turns out they’re absolutely necessary if you want to connect with the person you love, regardless of the fact that you live with them and see them everyday.

Good cocktails and a romantic bar are also helpful.

My partner asked if I missed “this” and by “this” he meant dating.

I paused to think. I knew I definitely didn’t miss it, but wasn’t sure how to explain it.

I pointed out how this bar wouldn’t seem as great if I were here on a lukewarm date. It was so much nicer to be sitting with someone I already knew and enjoy and can relax with, to not be self conscious or worried or jumping to conclusions; to just be in the moment.

The next day I realized I meant to say: We date to never date again. 

Dating isn’t fun. Meeting someone we actually like who likes us back and asks us out again and again and again so that we don’t have to keep going through this exhausting process is the goal.

Dating is probably one of the worst human experiences one purposely puts themselves through.

I was reminded of meeting a guy off OKCupid at a different fancy cocktail bar way back when. We hit it off, went back to his place and the next morning he put on records, made breakfast and we sat on his couch drinking coffee until I had to leave for work.

Then he blew me off when we had plans to meet again.

This is one of many examples of times when my knees gently touched another’s as our bar stools swiveled closer. Dim lights. Good music. The warm, lightheadedness of alcohol and physical attraction. The tempered excitement of the feelings being mutual.

And then the inevitable ghosting. 

So no, I don’t miss being out there.

P.S. Don’t make breakfast for someone the next morning if you’re not interested in seeing them again.


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