Make-Ummmm, What?


I’ve been watching makeup tutorials online. This is not the first time I’ve done it. But I guess I’m coming back to it in earnest? Or something.

I decided to spend a long time in Ulta on Sunday. For some reason I thought it was going to be fun. I don’t know why I thought this.

I almost had a panic attack (exaggeration) about ten minutes in when I realized how freaking overwhelming that place is. Like, how one makeup line can take up an ENTIRE aisle filled with 99% of things I don’t use or more specifically, don’t have any idea what they even are.

That’s when I had an epiphany of sorts. I’ve never been good at make up because I’m not good at art.

They don’t call themselves makeup artists for nothing.

It truly is a craft. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always respected the industry, especially after living with one as her live-in nanny. I always appreciated her technique and ability, I just didn’t take into account how you really have to have an eye and understanding of everything from colors to shadows to lines to skin types to event.

Hence the reason I am CLUELESS.

And also, I have no idea how I’d even learn to do this myself without a ton of time and practice, neither of which I’m dying to invest in.

So I took a deep breath in the NYX aisle and told myself I didn’t need teal eyeliner and to focus on the few things I was interested in trying instead of finding something new and even more confusing.

Ulta’s set up amuses me. I love how it’s literally divided in half for people who only want to spend about $10 for foundation and the other half opting to pay $40. It made me wonder how much better the expensive stuff is. Benefit makes me break out. Smashbox has been OK, but I only ask for things as gifts. My friend whose brother works at Sephora gave me some NARS blush which I like, but again, wouldn’t pay for.

Anyway, I’m all about the “Best Drugstore Finds for Under $10” videos. I bought a couple super cheap things in the clearance aisle at Ulta and decided I could get the rest of what I wanted at Target.

I bought foundation (which I haven’t worn since high school), Vaseline tinted lip gloss (?), an eyelash curler (I got this at TJ Maxx), an eyebrow pencil powder thing and one of those weirdly shaped make up sponges which is all the rage (or so it seems based on it being at every store.)

Oh and a mini sample of OPI nail polishes because I’ve decided to wear more open toed shoes this summer, as opposed to the last two or three where having to do foot upkeep sounded like a super drag so I wore flats.

There is a part of me that does not want to care about any of this stuff. Honestly. Figuring it out. Spending the money. Taking time out of my day for it.

Then again, it scratches the itch of purchasing something that doesn’t feel too expensive, but indulgent in a way.

I joined Ipsy and also bought a $7 Target beauty box because it’s fun to get stuff in the mail that isn’t a bill.

I may end up looking like a clown in daylight, so if you see me, don’t be afraid to tell me I’m really a “Cool” and not a “Warm” or that I put my bronzer in the wrong place.

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